Sorry I’m late. I got delayed by a goofy gorilla named No. 4

Image courtesy Pixabay

I cannot believe it happened again.

Have you ever fallen asleep at a time you normally do not, slept hard, then woke to think it was morning instead of night?

That’s what I would like to talk about today. Good morning! It’s 4:20 a.m. and time for…Your Morning Bowl. I’m David Heitz.

In the year 2000, I flew to Detroit from Los Angeles, where I was living at the time, to interview for a job at The Detroit News.

I left LAX in the morning, landed in Detroit around noon, and immediately went to my interview.

After four hours or so of interviews, I returned to my room at the Pontchatrain around 6 p.m., exhausted.

Here’s where the story gets good. After sleeping less than an hour, I woke to the glowing clock: 6:45.

But I thought it was a.m., even though it was p.m.

I threw all my belongings into my suitcase, flew down the hotel steps to the lobby (no time to wait for a slow elevator!) and hailed a taxi to the airport. My plane was to depart in less than one hour!

Or so I thought. When I got to the airport, I was curious that it had not gotten brighter outside in the past hour. Instead, it had become darker.

And that’s when I learned it was not 8 a.m. It was 8 p.m.!

And I learned this while boarding a flight to Los Angeles – 12 hours early.

Long story short, they let me on the flight – that’s right, 12 hours and a day early – and I even got the job at The Detroit News.

Ha! That’s exactly what happened tonight. As it kept getting darker, I began to fear for our world!

How could this happen again? Gorilla Glue No. 4, that’s how

Well, this just happened again tonight. Except this time, I wasn’t needing to go anywhere, so I didn’t hail any cabs.

I woke up at 6:45 – about two hours ago – and thought it was a.m. But it’s p.m.!

I blame the Gorilla Glue No. 4.

Gorilla Glue is a famous strain of cannabis that can come in either an indica, sativa or hybrid blend. Today I tried a strain by Revolution that is 80 percent sativa.

This is an absolutely remarkable strain. It lifts me up and makes me productive, with absolutely zero head fog. I purchased a pack of three pre-rolled joints (almost a gram each) for $25.

“Gorilla Glue #4, developed by GG Strains, is a potent hybrid strain that delivers heavy-handed euphoria and relaxation, leaving you feeling ‘glued’ to the couch,” Leafly reports. “Taking first place in both the Michigan and Los Angeles 2014 Cannabis Cups as well as the High Times Jamaican World Cup, this multiple award-winning hybrid’s supremacy is no longer a secret, and consumers will search far and wide to get their hands sticky with Gorilla Glue #4.”

When the euphoria ends, you plunge into deep sleep. Sleep is so healing, isn’t it?

With allergies in full force, yet the weather so mild there’s no need for A.C., I have been sneezing my fool head off with the windows open. So tonight I took a Benadryl on top of the Gorilla Glue No. 4.

Benadryl is known for knocking you out. So, that explains the one-two punch that has me concluding the Friday, Sept. 8 version of “Your Morning Bowl,” at 9:20 p.m. the night before.

And that’s not a bad thing, as work-related (paid work!) emails already are calling for tomorrow.

Have a great weekend!

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